How aware are you of your energy and when you’re experiencing someone else’s? We can hold other people’s energies in our field, often without knowing it. There are probably people who you have felt and held their energy your whole life. And it can get difficult to know what or who is you and what is someone else. It can feel weird. Last time I felt really out of my own energy was last Saturday. I felt dizzy, light headed, a bit manic, emotional, depressed, hysterical. I felt unclear, ungrounded and really really wafty. It could be different for you. Maybe you feel angry or sad out of nowhere, or really scared with no real reason for it.
It is difficult to know what to do in those situations when you just don’t feel like yourself. Sometimes it takes identifying who the person is whose energy you’re feeling, to release it. Think or feel about everyone who you’ve had recent contact with and trust that you will intuitively know whose energy it is. If you don’t know though and feel weird after catching a train or being at work surrounded by people it’s harder to recognise and let it go. Of course you can do things like burn sage all around yourself. But if you don’t have sage at hand and don’t want to smell like you’re about to be put in a soup, grounding back in your energy feels like the most effective thing.
By grounding I mean feeling fully in your body. Feeling the ground beneath your feet, connecting with your place on the earth. Imagine energy running down your legs through your feet into the ground and then drawing it up through the earth into your feet up your legs and into your belly. Deeply breathe it up and down a few times and firmly connect to the ground. And come back to being clear and certain about who you are, what is going on for you and what emotions you might be experiencing.
It can get a bit puritanical though and we can get too focused on being “clean” and having clear energy. And I don’t know how useful or even realistic this is. There might be a reason that you feel someone else’s energy. Maybe there is some similar emotion you and this other person are feeling and you can be more aware of it by feeling it for someone else other than yourself. Maybe it’s not the worst thing to feel someone else’s energy because it illuminates for you your energetic sensitivities. Maybe it helps you feel compassion for someone else, by really feeling and experiencing their energy and what they are going through. And it doesn’t always have to be negative. At the risk of sounding way out there, you can connect with angel energy and feel light, bright, pure, joyful energy and it can lift you up. Or connect with the energy of a furry four-legged friend and feel grounded and calm and peaceful (and maybe hungry if it happens to be a Labrador.)
It comes down to intention and what you want. If you are holding energies for other people to try and save them or take them on so they won’t have to feel them themselves, then unfortunately, despite how noble this might seem or how much you might try, this isn’t going to work. People have to want to help themselves. And you can’t go through others’ challenges for them. It’s an uncomfortable truth and can take time to really accept this, especially if you’ve been doing it all your life. It doesn’t mean you can’t support other people it just means you can’t hold someone else’s energy and try to take on their emotions in order to protect them from them.
Maybe a good place to start is being aware of who you do this for. And notice how your energy feels after you’ve been with them or had contact with them and if you still feel like yourself. Also ask why you might do this. Does it play into an idea of yourself as a saviour or a martyr and make you feel good in an ego sort of way? Does going into someone else’s energy provide you with a way to skip over your own feelings, and allow you to focus on others rather than going deep with yourself and going into those places that might scare or confront you. If this feels true for you, it’s ok, we all do it. Again, the first step is really just be aware of when or why you might do this.
It can be hard to be open to believing in all of this stuff. Depending on the mood you’re in it could all feel like bullshit and irrelevant. On Saturday when I felt out of sorts I was convinced it was just some personal problem that I was going through and it felt stupid at the time to try and think of it in terms of energy and whether it felt like me or not me. And I think it’s ok to bring a healthy amount of cynicism to it and ask the questions you need answered and figure out what you believe and don’t believe just for yourself. I do think though the times that we feel really clear in our energy are very powerful. Even those times when we are fully in our energy and we find that we feel sad or angry. It can feel liberating and relieving and clear to really and truly feel it even if it is also challenging and painful.
It’s ok to feel other energies and connect with what’s around us as long as you aware of it and you keep coming and wanting to come back to yourself. Because at the end of the day it’s your energy, in your life that you’re here to experience and you want to do that as fully and completely as you possibly can.